How it all started
I started my first Instagram account a little over two years ago. For the first time, I shared what I was drawing all day with the world out there. Now, after two years, I'm quitting again. Even though it has taken me further in my artistic development.
What I have learnt
In the beginning, it took a lot of courage for me to post my drawings or pictures. I knew that none of it was perfect. Over time, I learnt that it's not perfection that counts, but that it's fun to share ideas and inspiration. I was happy to be able to inspire others and it was great to record my own progress. It was fun documenting a part of my life, capturing my first commissions and sharing my enthusiasm.
I was able to learn a lot or be inspired by my favourite illustrators. The challenges for various prompts or DTIYS have challenged and inspired me. My favourite challenge was "our Planet week". It encouraged me to keep going with what I'm doing. In a positive way, it forced me to actually finish my pictures and at some point to say, now it's good enough and not to want to keep improving and improving. I have learnt to showcase my images better and I have challenged myself time and time again to share the thoughts behind the images.
The enthusiasm fades
The joy did not last very long. There were always weeks in which I really enjoyed creating new content, in which I had lots of ideas and in which I was incredibly grateful for my very loyal followers and their super lovely feedback.
But there were weeks when I was really stressed about having Instagram content ready, writing captions or seeing that the stats weren't very satisfying despite all the work. I had to learn to appreciate my work regardless of the feedback. But even though it made me stronger, it still burnt me out a bit over time and I needed a break.
In a way, Instagram has taken away my freedom to simply create. I knew it had to fit into my feed, I was doing too many different things to be able to create a uniform, aesthetic feed and the frustration grew.
Personal values
Over the last few months, I've been pondering more and more. Can I still stand behind it? Do I even want to create more content on a platform that I try to avoid as a consumer? Do I want to be part of it? Is it really worth the work and frustration? Or could the path to self-employment work without Instagram?
Quitting became more and more tempting.
The Challenge
At the end of February, I decided to challenge myself. I want to go full throttle for two months and then decide. Either continue with a plan and a vision. Or it's over.
What spoke in favour of quitting
The incessant creation of content tired me out. As an artist, I have become exhausted and tired. But more importantly, over the last two years, I've been studying the brain in depth and have become increasingly aware of the impact social media has on our brains. So if I don't want to consume such content myself, why should I create content? Sure, I know that there is content that definitely has added value or inspires and informs. Nevertheless, I have realised that I want to shape my path differently.
What made it hard for me to quit
Especially in the week after I made my decision, a lot of people approached me and told me how great they find it that I post so much, that I write great and inspiring stuff, and so on. That made me feel a bit unsure for a moment. Because that's exactly what probably pretty much all artists have in common. We want to tell stories, evoke emotions, ignite discussions. And it's just easy to reach people through social media.
Apart from that, I was surprised how obvious the fear of missing out was if I no longer had an Instagram account. It was a sad thought to think about not being able to keep up with the DTIYS that my favourite illustrators initiate or not being able to keep up with other challenges or competitions in the illustrator community and not being quite as connected.
What next?
Well, despite everything, I've made the decision to stop using Instagram for the time being. It's been two great years that have brought me a lot further. Now it's time for new paths. And I'm looking forward to going my own way away from Instagram. I'm looking forward to having a lot of free time and I'm excited to see what direction my artistic development will take without Instagram.
I will continue to give you insights into my everyday life on YouTube, take you with me on my journey and my website will of course be updated on an ongoing basis.